About three months ago, I let y’all know that I was going through speech therapy. That therapy has wrapped up, so I suppose it’s time for an update.

The end result is: it worked. It’s been months since I last had an incident where my vocal chords “didn’t engage.” But the results go beyond that. My speaking voice is louder and clearer than it has been for a very long time. I find myself engaging in actual conversations, rather than just brief exchanges of pleasantries. There is a little bit of a trade-off, however: I now run out of air quicker than I used to. That is to say, I have to pause for breath more frequently. I’m not as bad as Stevie Kenarban; in fact, I only really notice it when I’m trying to sing along with old familiar songs. There are a lot of classic rock songs where I had never noticed how long the singer sometimes goes without inhaling.

Of course, Parkinson’s is a progressive sumbitch, so my throat cannot be considered “cured.” The nice speech lady says I should continue doing my vocal exercises, preferably every day, FOREVER. At the very least, she says I should read a page or two aloud from whatever book I’m reading at the moment. So maybe I’ll start reading the Bible. To my dog. See if I can convince him to repent. But that’s assuming I could get him to pent the first time.