Today on Thymptom Thurthday, we return to everyone’s favorite topic: poop.

When I last addressed this topic, I had been using a stool softener (docusate) for a few weeks, and was considering increasing the dosage. The label on the store brand I bought said to take 2 – 4 tablets (the tablets are 50 mg each) at bedtime. Two tablets per night provided appreciable, though incomplete, improvement. So, I tried taking four tablets once. ONCE. This resulted in a full day of unpleasant gut rumblings and Rod-Stewart-style incidents.

In the midst of all this, a fellow Rock Steady Boxer recommended I try psyllium once a day, along with polyethylene glycol (generic MiraLAX) twice a day. In regard to the psyllium specifically, she advised me to “drink quickly because it turns into a nasty gel fairly fast.” What she didn’t tell me was that’s it’s also pretty nasty before it gels up. So, I gave up on the psilly stuff pretty quickly and tried using just the polyethylene glycol.

Ladies and/or gentlemen, lemme tell ya…this stuff has been GREAT. I’ve been taking approximately 17 grams, once or twice a day, for at least two weeks. I have had no constipation, no incontinence, just a happy bowel! The product comes in powder form, and all ya gotta do is stir it into a glass of water. It’s completely smooth (no grittiness) and it has what I would call a faint citrus flavor that actually makes it pleasant to drink, even mixed with just plain tap water. If controlling my bowel movements is going to be this easy going forward then, hopefully, I’m done talking about this shit.